Fall seven times. Stand up eight.

Well I’ve just had a horror of a week.  And the worst part is its not going to get better any time soon.  It is not appropriate for me to go into details on this blog, as it is very personal and complicated and involves another person who deserves privacy. And it is all tangled up with my chronic illness, and my weight problems.

And in terms of my adherence to 12wbt principles, I made some very bad choices.  Wednesday night and Thursday night I indulged in some binge/comfort eating.  I can’t remember the last time I ate like that, my emotions were really controling my decision making.  After returning from my yoga class, (which I was very disappointed with – I have decided to seek out another teacher and say goodbye to $70) – Wednesday night I made the pizza – sweet potato and capsicum, yummo! But emotionally I just wasn’t satisifed.  So I kept on eating all night.  Finishing with a 100g block of dark chocolate.

Woke up determined to do better.  And I did, until I was cooking dinner for myself and my family.  I managed to polish off a packet of Swiss cheese slices while getting dinner ready, and Swiss cheese isn’t even on the ingredient list for Penang Chicken!  Late that night I thought another 100g block of dark chocolate was a good idea.  I know, why was it even in the house?  Well, I bought it that afternoon while buying the chicken because thought I was over the emotions, and initially I was only planning to have two squares.

Friday was much, much, much better.  It did end though with another 100g of dark chocolate. (They were two for five dollars on Thursday at the supermarket).  Good news is I know I like Lindt “Passion fruit intense”.

Woke up this morning knowing I can make choices to make today better.  Its going okay so far.  I’ve got a list of strategies ready to make sure if my emotions get out of control I can do something besides eat to get them to go away.

Could not resist including this picture.  Master G and Miss G both do Taekwondo.  Their instructor is a big fan of Chuck Norris – seriously, forget Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee.  😉

This picture makes me smile – big time.  Mastering a martial art is all about self discipline, Master G has shown me that the last few years.

Could you ever imagine Chuck inhaling a whole packet of Swiss cheese slices, or three 100g blocks of dark chocolate over three nights because he was feeling sad about something?

Chuck Norris fact of the day: Chuck Norris can teach an old dog new tricks.

What I Ate Wednesday 25-1-12 Total Calories 1121

Breakfast

Banana Bruschetta

297 calories

12wbt recipe

 

 

 

 

 

 

Morning Tea

McDonald’s small skim cappuccino

71 calories

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lunch

“Sushi Bay” Sushi Train – three items – total calories 311

Miso Soup – 91 calories

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tuna and Salmon Sashimi – 160 calories

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seaweed Salad Battleship – 60 calories

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Afternoon Snack

Popcorn – had some of Master G and Miss G’s popcorn at the movies

I estimate about 171 calories worth – when I thought I had had enough I told Master G (the keeper of the popcorn) to smack my hand if I took anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dinner

Spinach and Mushroom Frittata

271 calories

12wbt meal

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You can run but you can’t hide

During Round 3 2011 I only had one Red Flag day – and that was on the Saturday of week 12.  So I didn’t really have to worry too much about Red Flag days.

Now from the first day after Round 3 finished to Boxing Day – there were many Red Flags for me.  But I have to admit I was a little slack and didn’t worry too much about them.  I tried to make good choices when I could – but for those two and a bit weeks I really loosened the reigns.  I don’t believe in regrets, but I know for sure I won’t make those kind of choices in December 2012.  No regrets, just learning and moving on.

So yesterday was my first Red Flag day of 2012. Once a year Mr G and I take the kids to Jamberoo Recreation Park.  For our family it means eating out all day – yes even breakfast.  So I decided to track all my calories and do my best to keep it close to 1200 calories.

Breakfast – wait for it – McDonald’s – eeeeek!  We’re on the road early and we live more than 20 minutes from the nearest McDonald’s – so its a special treat for the kids.  Now, I know I could have eaten breakfast at home or taken in an apple – but I made the choice to join my family for the treat.  I was hoping to have the porridge and a skim cappuccino.  But the porridge is no longer on the menu.  Second choice was the yoghurt – sold out – yikes!  Considered the hotcakes – especially as there is now the “healthy option” with the hotcakes – berries and yoghurt.  Can’t remember the exact kjs – but not much better than the regular hotcakes with butter and syrup for 662 calories.  Settled on an Egg and Bacon McMuffin for 297 calories with a skim cappuccino for 71 calories.

Next stop is the petrol station.  Old habits die hard.  While paying for the petrol I pick up a packet of what we call “jelly lollies”.  Now in the past I would have bought two or three packs – but I just settled for one pack of Snakes.  Further along the journey I open the pack to share with the family.  Instead of just shovelling one in my mouth, I decide to check the calories first.  EEEEK!  Bit of a shock, after all they are fat free!  Decide to indulge in two – and only two – during the journey to Jamberoo.  Total calories – 50!

Lunch is next.  We discovered a food outlet at Jamberoo which is a well kept secret.  It’s called “The Loft”.  They have a few salads and wraps on offer as well as the usual suspects.  They also have beer and wine.  I had decided to make it a treat meal and indulge in a nice cold beer.  Haven’t enjoyed a beer since August last year.  I chose to have a Caesar Salad with chicken.  So beer = 105 calories and salad probably = 370 calories.

However, the big mistake I will never make again was choosing a Tonic Water.  I was thirsty, but didn’t want to guzzle my beer to quench my thirst.  So I decided to get a bottle of water to do the quenching first.  There was no Sparkling Mineral Water (my favourite treat) and no Soda Water.  But I spotted the Tonic Water.  I knew it wasn’t calorie free – but how bad can it be right?  75 calories bad – that’s how bad.  I love the taste of it, and thought because its not overtly sweet it must be low in calories.  Seriously – its not that far off the Light Beer I had!  Won’t be doing that again.

The day so far: Breakfast 368 + Snack 51 + Lunch 550.

Afternoon tea time came and I have to admit I was tempted by the icecreams the others were having and the “healthy” gigantic Honey & Oat cookie.  Pleased to say I resisted and just had another regular size skim cappuccino.  71 calories.

On the way home Mr G and kids just had to have a Frozen Coke from McDonalds.  Not in the least tempted by that.  But normally I would have a Coke Zero.  But I am committed to no more of that for me.  So I happily settled for a green tea and bottle of water – not Tonic  Water!  2 calories.

It was getting late – and no one felt like preparing dinner when we got home – so the decision was made to eat out.  I voted (and my vote carries a lot of weight) for The Coffee Club – since the kjs are on the menu I could make the best choice possible.

I was tempted to go for the Grilled Salmon and Vegies – one look at the kjs for that changed my mind.  Its surprising how the foods we associate with being healthy choices can sometimes be so high in calories.  I opted instead for the Greek Salad with Smoked Salmon – 284 calories.  I did indulge though – remember I didn’t know about the Tonic Water surprise yet – Mr G ordered garlic bread and I had one piece.  110 calories.

So, the entire day added up to 1,436 calories.  236 calories over what I really should have.

But here’s the good news for future Red Flag Days.  Take off the Tonic Water and Garlic Bread and I’m only 51 calories over.  Substitute a Sparkling Mineral Water for the Snakes and I’m exactly 1200 calories!  I would not have been hard to forgo those three items.  And then I would have eaten out for an entire day, feeling satisfied and indulged and not gone hungry and still stayed within my calorie quota.

So I learned that by making careful choices on Red Flag Days I can enjoy eating with others, stay healthy and stay on track.

When I got home – I logged onto http://www.myfitnesspal.com and entered everything I ate and drank.  This was actually the impossible task I had set for myself for the day from the 30+ Crew 8 Week Challenge.  In the past on other diets if I had a Red Flag Day I would just pretend it never happened, bury my head in the sand, run and try to hide.

But the truth is you can run and hide.  You are what you eat.  And if you are honest with yourself about what you are choosing you are going to be further ahead than if you pretend the “bad days” don’t count.

So how can you benefit from my experience yesterday?  Be aware that you can eat out all day for 1200 calories or 4800 calories or more.  Its your choice.  And be aware that most of your Red Flag Days will probably only involve one meal.

I’m not so worried about Red Flag Days anymore. Luckily, as my next one is one Friday.  But, I’ll be dealing with that one a little bit differently after my experience yesterday.

And I won’t be drinking Tonic Water.  I will be remembering that by saying no to somethings, I’ll be saying YES to something far more important to me.

When is your next Red Flag Day?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

12wbt Blogging Challenge – A Picture of Health

What is a picture of health?

To be at a healthy BMI.

To no longer be morbidly obese.

To not have to worry excessively about Type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, increased risk of cancer, increased risk of heart problems, being in that pine box before my time.

Whenever I have worked at losing weight in the past it has always been for vanity related reasons – you know – “I wanna be a size 10”.  But this time it’s all about being healthy for the rest of my life.

I’m making changes now I’m going to maintain for the rest of my life.  I’ve started down a positive path now, and there’s no turning back.  I am determined that I am not going to need lap band surgery to get to a healthy weight.

After six and half weeks of changing my life I’m enjoying exercise and enjoying good healthy food in sensible portions.  And, probably most importantly, I’ve got a healthy attitude towards myself and a belief that I can achieve.

My current BMI is 42.28. I’ll be doing round after round of 12wbt until my BMI is under 25.  Then I’ll feel like I’m healthy.

Vegetables are not unlimited, repeat vegetables are not unlimited!

A real light bulb moment happened while I was preparing my lunch today.  I was making the Salad Niscoise from the crunchtime cookbook for my lunch today.  I was making a single serving for myself, and my first impulse was to just grab a handful of beans.  But I thought to myself – follow Mish’s recipe. I put that handful of beans on the scales and was horrified to see it was more than 4 times what I was meant to be having!!!

I slowly put one bean at a time on the scales – there were to be only 5 beans in the salad, not a handful!

I was shocked.  I spent 9 years as a Weight Watchers leader, starting just when the Points Program was introduced in Australia, and vegetables were allocated 0 points – which most members took to mean eat vegies until you burst.  I certainly didn’t discourage this thinking – in fact I recall actively encouraging it!

What have I learnt today?  A calorie is a calorie is a calorie.  No more piling as many vegies on the plate for me.

What have you learnt today?

A dinner plate with no carbs?

Because I was too impatient to wait for preseason to start I dusted off my copy of the Crunchtime cookbook on the weekend.  (I had bought it when it was first published hoping somehow that simply having it on my shelf would see some of The Biggest Loser contestants’ success rub off on me.)

To my horror I discovered that most evening meals had no carbs!  How could I face my evening meal with no potato or pasta or couscous or rice – you get the picture I’m sure.

Well – last night I bit the bullet – no carbs in those – and didn’t put any rice on my plates.  When my lovely 10 year old daughter went for her second scoop of rice, she offered to get some for me.  No thanks, I said somewhat feebly.  But – I survived!

And tonight I actually peeled and chopped the potatoes for my family to eat, while not planning on dishing any up for myself.  And I’ve survived yet again.  I was happy with the meatloaf and salad and mushrooms on my plate.

Loving the Crunchtime cookbook already, tomorrow night’s dinner is cooling down on the stove as I type – Ratatouille.  I’ll enjoy that tomorrow night, as the rest of the family indulges in chippy night.